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Negative NaySayers

acehiggy

Member
I got my empennage kit almost two years ago and didn't start working on it until about 4 months after receiving it. About the same time my mother fell and broke her hip so I had to stop to take care of her for 6 months. Then, her hip did not heal and had to have a total hip replacement, so that was another 6 months of taking care of her. Further, I had a spinal simulator implanted to help manage my back pain from being fuse from L2 to S1. So again, I didn't work on my airplane for awhile. I have very little done with my plane so far.

The only reason I am telling you this is because I constantly get snide remarks from friends and others like "you will never finish that plane" or "How little progress have you made on that plane" or "You will be too old to fly when that plane is done". Constant negativity from people about my airplane which has nothing to do with them. I build for enjoyment and yes I do want to fly as well. With my heart condition, Light Sport is my only option so I can't go out and buy a plane to fly why I am building. I just had a recent heart event again which required another stent, so Private Pilot license is definitely out of the question.

So my question to you all is this, "How do you deal with negativity and constant snide remarks from people about building my airplane"? It does irritate me and I am not always able to brush it off. I like my friends but enough is enough!
 
The way to deal with negative comments is to tell the person how their comments affect you.
Do not be defensive or make excuses for your shortcomings.
Do not become aggressive and attack the other person.
Just tell them how their comments make you feel and ask them to not do that any more.
 
Say "I do this instead of sitting on the couch watching people yell at each other on TV."
 
Tell them you are going to sell it and give up the project. Then don't tell them you are working on it, don't talk about it with them. Most don't think it bothers you to make their comments they are just having fun with you at your expense.
Build on, if their comments bother you I can tell you plan on finishing the project.
 
I experienced the same thing. You get all kinds of stupid remarks when the neighbors see you building a “plane” in your garage. After they see the final product it usually shuts them up.
 
First of all, very few know I'm building an airplane.

Everything is in my hangar almost an hour away.
Between all the projects around home, recent rotator cuff surgery, and wanting plenty of goof-off time in summer, progress has been slow.
I will also be building a new hangar at the airport close by. Already bought the land.

Standard answer: I enjoy the build process.
Whenever I'm able to scoot down to the hangar, I enjoy whatever tasks I'm able to complete.
I choose not to bring small projects home, as I have a nicely set up shop area, with all tools & materials organized there.
I don't want to get into trying to remember what tools are at the hangar, and what I've brought home.
Building the airplane is an enjoyable escape. It will fly when it's ready to fly. Someday.
 
Handling All That Stuff

Narcissistic nabobs of negativism. Maybe tell them the act of building is actually the thing. “And after I’ve kept at it long enough, I’ll have a great airplane.” But really, I like the idea that maybe these folks aren’t very good friends. They’re sure not airplane people. I’ve never built a whole airplane, but I’ve restored some, as my job. Funny, when you’re doing it for someone else and getting paid for it, the questions shift to “When’s it going to be done?” Standard answer, “Tuesday.” We never say which Tuesday. Setting a completion date is related to the balloon pilots’ philosophy, to wit: “Choose a destination, and you’ll never get there.”
 
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... I constantly get snide remarks from friends and others like "you will never finish that plane" or...

I acquired a third hand RV-6 empennage kit about 25 years ago. Once I got to a point where I needed help, I invited one of my best friends over to buck rivets or something like that. He helped me drill, deburr, dimple, and buck a bunch of rivets before he moved to Florida about the time the airplane went up on its gear.

A few years later, we were sitting under the RV-6's wing at Oshkosh and he confessed "When I first saw that empennage kit, I thought to myself "There's no way that ever gets finished.""

That's a friend - who bites his/her tongue and is willing to help even if he suspects the situation is hopeless. Friends don't figuratively **** on your dreams.
 
Just name your plane "Negative Inspiration". Paint it on the nose and just hope they ask to see a picture when completed. Offer to buy them a beer and tell them, "I couldn't have done it without your support".
 
Some of my best friends had those same comments. I took them as MOTIVATION. Few actually saw her but many knew of her. My answer to when will she be done, was always NEXT WEEK. That quieted them for awhile. After the 3rd or 4th NEXT WEEK they caught on. But when they doubted my ability to finish it, how could I let them be right ???? No better feeling than to finish and fly a plane that I BUILT IN MY GARAGE! 10 year build for me.
The naysayers are still my friends. I can now rag on them for anything I want.
 
If it makes you feel any better, it took me 27 years to finish my plane and fly it. In my defense, I took 10 years off during which I quit a job, moved to another state and, built a house.
 
Tuesday

When asked say, "I'll be finished on Tuesday or maybe Wednesday."

The smarter one's get it pretty fast and get the point.

The one's that can't think that quick say, "Really?" with a surprised look - you then know a secret about them. And just say, "Yep."

I've done it more than once, it's fun.
 
My response is "oh really? How fast did you build your airplane?"

That usually shuts people up pretty quick.
 
Guy in the hangar across from me has been working on a plans-only airplane for over 20 years. Will he ever finish? I don’t know. Does he enjoy the work? Absolutely. Tell the detractors you don’t waste your time on golf.
 
Oh my friend.... You did EXACTLY the right thing coming here. There's not a single soul on this site that won't support you 1000%. The negative people, and the world is full of them, can't reach up and climb out of their own slimy pots so they certainly don't want to see anyone else succeed either.

Building a plane is as much about the satisfaction of the journey as well as reaching the final goal of a finished plane. Take your time, do what you can and enjoy every moment of what you do. God bless you fellow aviator!
 
The Wright Brothers had naysayers

Most people I met were astounded at the fact that we can even build our own aircraft, and have no idea how long it should take. Mine took 17 years to fly, and while I have lots of "excuses" as to why, I really enjoyed the journey.

I like a quote attributed to Sam Goldwyn:

Samuel Goldwyn said:
Don't pay any attention to the critics - don't even ignore them.
 
Dumb founded people

Ha HA HA I just laugh.
I bought an RV-6 kit all at once in the fall of 1991. I am in construction. Supposed to get the whole kit in November but didn't get it till April the next year cause somebody sold 5 kits to the Nigerian airforce just before I paid for mine. The economy was tanked.
But by April I had gotten real busy building houses and no time to build plane for the next 10 years. Money Money Money
Worked on it two different winters for 1,021 hours. Sheet metal all done, motor mounted, most fiberglass work done etc. no wiring or paint
Oh wait it I 2020 and the plane is still not done.
It looks like it did, WHAT? 18 years ago.
Will I get it done YES I am now retired, and have more money than I can spend a hangar to work V/S my home shop
Tell people It ain't no a Lego set and move on with life. I love planes and yes I have an RV-6A to fly every day. DO THEY?
I get to go 200 Miles per hour if I want and not worry about the cops.
Oh ya I built about 350 houses in that time also.
Laugh till the cows come home. Art
 
Also consider, a lot of people who behave that way do so our of their own insecurity. You are displaying fortitude, perseverance and no small amount of skill, and I'd bet the ones who are the most insulting are the ones with the fewest accomplishments of their own to be proud of. So, be forgiving.
 
Negativity

We support you!

I've heard them all as well.

My favorite is when they say, "I ain't flying in that thing."
My response. "I didn't invite you!":D
 
Say "I do this instead of sitting on the couch watching people yell at each other on TV."

There are people in this world that spend their lives creating things and accomplishing wonders.

There are people in this world that spend their lives tearing down the efforts and accomplishments of others.

You know which group you are in; don't waste your precious time worrying about the other group. Soon enough you'll be flying over their heads.
 
Most have seen this but one of my favorites.

“...his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.”

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.“
-Theodore Roosevelt
 
I got my empennage kit almost two years ago and didn't start working on it until about 4 months after receiving it. About the same time my mother fell and broke her hip so I had to stop to take care of her for 6 months. Then, her hip did not heal and had to have a total hip replacement, so that was another 6 months of taking care of her. Further, I had a spinal simulator implanted to help manage my back pain from being fuse from L2 to S1. So again, I didn't work on my airplane for awhile. I have very little done with my plane so far.

The only reason I am telling you this is because I constantly get snide remarks from friends and others like "you will never finish that plane" or "How little progress have you made on that plane" or "You will be too old to fly when that plane is done". Constant negativity from people about my airplane which has nothing to do with them. I build for enjoyment and yes I do want to fly as well. With my heart condition, Light Sport is my only option so I can't go out and buy a plane to fly why I am building. I just had a recent heart event again which required another stent, so Private Pilot license is definitely out of the question.

So my question to you all is this, "How do you deal with negativity and constant snide remarks from people about building my airplane"? It does irritate me and I am not always able to brush it off. I like my friends but enough is enough!

I got my empennage kit as a Christmas present in 1998. It survived untouched through my Navy retirement, job search, 9/11, return to college, 2 kids college, wife's illness. I finally started working on it in 2014. I'm still not done.

I've been told by several folks that I'm my own worst critic. On bad days, I feel like everyone must be making fun of me behind my back. And, every time I screw up a part and have to order a replacement from Van's, I'm sure my wife is giving me eye-rolls when I'm not looking.

I've decided that building the airplane is a hobby. When its done, I'll have to find something else to build or restore. I actually went out and bought a little airplane to fly whenever i can, in addition to building. So, now I have 2 hobbies. Life's great! I'm off to screw up more parts. (....Honey, where's the checkbook?)
 
Naysayers are everywhere, including here on Vans Air Force. Simply IGNORE them. There’s jealousy and envy everywhere. People wish that they had your money, your airplane, your skills, your wife, your job, whatever. Be confident and realize your blessings that you have what you have, but for those that are rude or condescending, just don’t give them the time of day.
 
I always told the folks asking when and how I was going to get the RV7A completed, was the same way you eat and Elephant...one bite at a time. It will get done when it is done.... I started the build before I got married, had 2 kids, moved twice and the first flight was 14 years later....just by working on it a few hours a week.

It really helps to find some other builders or local EAA club to be a part of...

For what it is worth, there is a guy I know that has a 4 seat canard plane he started in 1986...it is almost done.
 
Naysayers are everywhere, including here on Vans Air Force. Simply IGNORE them. There’s jealousy and envy everywhere. People wish that they had your money, your airplane, your skills, your wife, your job, whatever. Be confident and realize your blessings that you have what you have, but for those that are rude or condescending, just don’t give them the time of day.

All that you can do is wish them well.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ns9BvYz8WE

Thank your stars you're not that way
Turn your back and walk away
Don't even pause and ask them why
Turn around and say goodbye

--Neil Peart
 
Some father daughter friends built an rv7a. While building a friend of Connie’s said “I would never fly an airplane I built” to which Connie replied “ I wouldn’t fly an airplane you built either!”
 
We support you!

I've heard them all as well.

My favorite is when they say, "I ain't flying in that thing."
My response. "I didn't invite you!":D

I had that exact conversation with more than one... and it was our last conversation. I still fly, and I still don't miss them.

Friends like that, you don't need.
 
The comment I heard the most during building was "you're not going to fly in that are you?"
After a while I just used Jeff Foxworthy's phrase "here's your sign":D

Quote from George Bernard Shaw that I have enjoyed my whole career :
"“The reasonable man adapts himself to the world: the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.”

Be unreasonable and keep building, I think bloody mindedness and persistence gets more planes built than intellect.

Figs
 
The comment I heard the most during building was "you're not going to fly in that are you?"
After a while I just used Jeff Foxworthy's phrase "here's your sign":D

Close, but I believe that is Bill Engvall's phrase.
 
Tell them “Life is a journey, not a destination.”

Some people row a boat across the ocean, some people climb Mt . Everest, and some people live their life without accomplishing anything notable at all. Building this incredible airplane is my Mt. Everest. What is yours?
 
Thank all of you for your comments and support! It brought tears to my eyes. What a wonderful community of aviators and builders. Thank you all!
 
Way back during my early days as a fresh new engineer, I was poking about over by the printer and overheard a couple ladies talking about a Lancair accident that had recently claimed one of our senior engineers. One of the ladies made a comment to the other along the lines of "what kind of (person/crazy person/idiot) flies in an airplane they built in their garage, anyway?"

I turned right around, looked her in the eye, and said "Well, I do."

The silent, jaw-flapping "brook trout" look on her face was priceless...
 
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